{"id":76400,"date":"2026-05-01T06:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-05-01T04:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/?p=76400"},"modified":"2026-05-03T13:31:50","modified_gmt":"2026-05-03T11:31:50","slug":"edition-26-05-cigars-against-know-it-all-smoke-instead-of-actually-smoke","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/edition-26-05-zigarren-gegen-besserwisser-rauch-statt-also-eigentlich\/","title":{"rendered":"EDITION 26\/05: Cigars against know-it-alls - Smoke instead of \u201eWell, actually...\u201c"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are people who enter a room like a software update: nobody wanted them, but suddenly everything is different - <em>and worse.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You say: \u201eNice evening.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He: \u201eSo \u2018beautiful\u2019 is actually subjective.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes, and <em>actually<\/em> your contribution is also subjectively unnecessary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You say: \u201ePetra showed her children the ropes today; perfectly to the point without anger.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He: \u201eSo that was actually a very wrong approach that encouraged the children even more to do the opposite of what they actually wanted. You don't have to get to the point, you have to make clear announcements; and while we're at it...\u201c (...and all you hear is kwack-kwack-kwack...)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Know-it-alls have a talent: they don't listen, <strong>what<\/strong> you say. You only hear, <strong>where<\/strong> they can intervene. Conversations are not encounters for them - they are a commentary area.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And now comes the problem: you can't \u201ewin\u201c against know-it-alls.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you discuss, he turns it into a lecture.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you disagree, it becomes his mission to know you better.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That's why you don't need arguments. You need <strong>Speed control<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And that's exactly what the cigar is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>The cigar, man!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A cigar is slow. It forces you to take breaks. And pauses are the know-it-all's kryptonite - because he thrives on reaction. He wants you to jump: \u201eOh! That's right! Tell me more!\u201c He needs that little reward that tells him: <em>I'm the smart one here.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You light the fire. Draw. Create time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And suddenly something very practical happens: you don't give him any space. No resistance, but also no invitation. Just this calm attitude: <em>I'm here to enjoy, not to be corrected.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Then his standard set is guaranteed:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eI'm only trying to help you.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Translation: \u201eI want to win, but I want to come across as sympathetic, you dumb arse.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And here comes your boss move:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You say nothing and take a leisurely drag on your cigar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This is not a capitulation. It is a <em>Exit<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That takes away everything he needs:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>No contradiction \u2192 no debate.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>No enthusiasm \u2192 no stage.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>No emotion \u2192 no fuel.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He can't do anything with it. He can't \u201ecorrect\u201c it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And the best thing is: while he's still explaining why he's right, you've already moved on. Not in the argument. In peace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because a cigar reminds you: you don't have to \u201eset the record straight\u201c in every conversation. You just have to decide whether you want to play along at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, if someone starts again with \u201eWell, actually...\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You draw.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You nod minimally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And say <em>nothing.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Do you want to say something know-it-all? Fire away! \ud83d\ude05<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:50px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"bildnachweis\">Picture credits<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Cover: ChatGPT: \u201eDraw an abstract picture that represents May. Without text.\u201c<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:50px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:50px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n<nav aria-label=\"breadcrumbs\" class=\"rank-math-breadcrumb\"><p><span class=\"label\">You are here:<\/span> <span class=\"last\">Home page<\/span><\/p><\/nav>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are people who enter a room like a software update: nobody wanted them, but suddenly everything is different - and worse. You say: \u201eHave a nice evening.\u201c...<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":76482,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[6691,662],"tags":[6693],"class_list":["post-76400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-edition","category-marktplatz","tag-edition-2026",""],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/12\/26-05_mai.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/76400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=76400"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/76400\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":76493,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/76400\/revisions\/76493"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/76482"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=76400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=76400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=76400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}