{"id":76392,"date":"2026-02-01T06:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-02-01T05:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/?p=76392"},"modified":"2025-12-21T16:08:37","modified_gmt":"2025-12-21T15:08:37","slug":"edition-26-02-cigars-against-small-talk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zigarren.zone\/en\/edition-26-02-zigarren-gegen-smalltalk\/","title":{"rendered":"EDITION 26\/02: Cigars versus small talk - smoke instead of \u201eSo, how's it going?\u201c"},"content":{"rendered":"

There are enemies who don't come with a baseball bat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They come with a smile. And a question.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eSo, how's it going?\u201c<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or even worse:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eSo, what's new?\u201c<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

These four words are not a conversation. It's an assault on your inner peace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You're standing around somewhere - an aperitif, birthday, networking evening, coincidentally near a buffet that looks like a sad salad graveyard - and suddenly there he is: the small-talk person. Usually dressed to the nines, always motivated, never tired. A person who says \u201eexciting\u201c without anything ever being exciting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And you know: here we go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eBusy?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

- \u201eYes, you?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eYes, full.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

- \u201eAh okay.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Silence.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then comes phase two: weather. Holidays. Property prices. Something about \u201eeverything is moving so fast these days\u201c. You feel your mind slowly leaving your body and looking for an emergency exit in the room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And this is where the cigar comes in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The cigar, man!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not as an escape. As a lifeboat.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because a cigar is the most elegant stop sign in the world. Not a plastic sign, not a \u201edo not disturb\u201c - but a burning, fragrant aura that says: I am present, but not available for trivialities.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don't have to explain anything. You don't even have to talk. You light up - and suddenly something wonderful happens: people respect you without knowing why. (...er...well, that doesn't always happen).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The cigar turns you into a figure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You're no longer \u201ethat one\u201c. You're \u201ethe one with the cigar\u201c. That's a status. It's a role. It's almost a profession.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While others are talking frantically as if they have to justify their existence, you are sitting there, pulling slowly, gazing into the distance - and looking as if you are having very important thoughts about life. In truth, you're just thinking about whether you want another espresso later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But it looks damn deep.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And the best thing: a cigar brings back breaks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In modern society, pauses are suspicious. If you don't talk, people immediately think you're planning something. Or you're sad. Or you're \u201eweird\u201c. A pause is seen as a defect in the system.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The cigar turns the break into an event.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You sit there, look, pull, let time pass - and nobody asks: \u201eAre you OK?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because it looks intentional.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Small talk people hate intention. They live on fill-in-the-blank sentences. From air. Of words that carry nothing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You, on the other hand, are wearing smoke.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of course there are counter-attacks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Someone always says: \u201eWow, that smells strong!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, that's the point. It's not a scented candle with \u201eforest walk and cosiness\u201c. It is tobacco. It is character. It is: I have decided to be here, but not to become part of your discussion group.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then there is the moral variant: \u201eIsn't that unhealthy?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The same person is holding a glass of Prosecco and a mini quiche thing, 80% of which is butter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You nod slowly, like a wise man who has seen a lot. Say nothing. Draw. Let the question evaporate in the air.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And suddenly you realise: The cigar is not just an antidote to small talk. It's a filter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Someone comes closer and doesn't ask about the weather, but:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eWhat are you smoking?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eHow does it taste?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eWhat difference does it make?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suddenly it's about things that actually exist: Flavours, craftsmanship, time, tranquillity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is not \u201enetworking\u201c. That is human.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There will always be small talk. It lurks in corridors, at events, in queues. It comes across as friendly and yet takes your energy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But you are prepared.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You have no excuse. You have a cigar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A cigar, man!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And while others talk to avoid being quiet, you sit there and are quiet - on purpose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why don't you talk to me now, in the comments box below. But no small talk, please. \ud83d\ude05<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
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Picture credits<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
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  • Cover: ChatGPT: \u201eDraw an abstract picture representing February with snowdrops in the centre. Without text.\u201c<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
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